Good things happen to God people
I've a blessed life, both personally and professionally. But I too have struggled, stumbled and at times fallen down in the past several years. Yet, no matter what has happened, I've gotten up. Sometimes it was those around me that pulled me up, while other times it was my faith that lifted me up, witout me even knowing. Yet, no matter what happened, I've never given up. I am strong. I am confident. I am positive that good things happen to God people. No, that wasn't a typo. Go back, read it again: Good things happen to God people. And here's how I know:
I grew up going to Church every Sunday. First was Sunday School for an hour at 9:30, followed by a 30 minute fellowship time while we awaited those who didn't attend Sunday School. Then promptly at 10am, Brother Bob, my hometown church Pastor, would begin our Service. Some sundays he would only take about an hour. But as anyone who knows anything about a Southern Missionary Baptist Preacher will tell you, when God speaks to him you might be there (in church) well past lunch time. But with Brother Bob we were usually done around 11:30. Then, Sunday night's before the evening service was the men's business meeting and while I rarely went to the sunday evening service, my (grand)Father never missed a sunday night. Then through the week we had the youth service meetings on Tuesday or Wednesday evenings. So why explain all of this?
Because three and a half years ago I lost that beloved (grand)Father of mine. It was suddenly, with no warning. Honestly, he was never even sick. I was shocked, in dismay, completely torn apart for several months after he passed away. My work suffered, my personal life was shaken and I got really angry. No.....angry doesn't begin to describe it. I was down right pissed off and looking for someone to scream at. I wanted someone to blame. I needed someone to explain to me why this had to happen. But it wasn't anyone's fault, and as my rage built up, my inner chaos grew and slowly I stepped away from God.
I now know what I did was wrong, but back then I was looking for a way to deal with the devastating trauma of loosing my (grand)Fahter, my friend, my number one supporter......MY HERO. So, while it's shameful, I blamed God. I kept asking why. I prayed and prayed and asked for peace in my heart. I cried out for answers. I begged every day over and over for months to please bring me some calming because the suffering in my heart was more than I could bare. And when the pain didn't end, and the feelings didn't get any better I walked away. I turned my back, stopped going to church, quit reading my bible, and didnt even pray. I was feeling things that I had never felt in my entire life. I was weak and vulnerable, frankly, it was the lowest time in my entire life.
Time passed, and after (grand)Father had been gone for a year I asked my Husband to take me back to Ohio to see his and (grand)Mother's resting place. I'd not been to the cemetary since we laid him to rest and I needed to go see them. I sat there in the cemetary on the green grass and cried and cried. I spoke to them as though they were both sitting right there in front of me. I told them of the past year, bragged about the children, asked their advice on matters of the heart and left there feeling no better than I had before I arrived at Lakewood Township Cemetary. Oddly enough though, on the drive home, I downloaded a Bible app for my iphone. Right now I don't recall what I was thinking, I just remember I wanted to read Psalms. So I spent the next 8 hours reading Psalms, thinking about things, asking questions silently.
My healing time took longer than I thought it would. From the day that I downloaded the app, to the day that I finally got the answer to my prayer was about two and a half years. (grand)Father died on April 19, 2012 and I finally feel whole again today December 26, 2015. Today I read something very sad about a woman I know who was recently diagnosed with a brain tumor. She's my age, has a daughter in my daughter's class and is one of the kindest women I know. So how did this horrible thing that I read about this woman help me? It made me think all over again....why her God? This thinking lead me to do an internet search on her condition and I got my answer. Most people with her condition don't even know about it until it's to late. Most people don't know until there is nothing they can do but die. But somehow, for some reason, she found out early. How did she find out early? Why did she find out early?...........BECAUSE GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOD PEOPLE!
Yes her situation is tragic, but not hopeless. Just like with my (grand)Father. I never in a trillion years would ever have wanted anything bad to happen to him. I never would have wanted him to suffer in any way. He was prideful, stubborn and very independent. He was one in a million and today for the first time I closed my eyes, said a prayer and THANKED GOD that my HERO never had to suffer. That my faithfuilly devoted Christian (grand)Father never had to feel anything as he drifted away in his slumber to go meet his wife in Heaven.
It's taken a long time, far longer than it shoud have, for me to get to this point. I'm ashamed to admit what I've typed here, but willingly admitting to my sins both publicly and privately. And the topping on my cake for today was this: My own Miracle! Just as I am sitting here typing, my husband, who has never asked me to attend church looks over at me and says, "Hey, ya wanna go to church with me tomorrow?". It's amazing, his timing, since he (my husband) has no idea what I'm currently sitting here typing. But then again, he doesn't need to know, GOD already knew.
~~ k.m.drury
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